It is a strange thing getting older. In honesty, it really kind of sucks. The good days of not having to work, or having to really care about anything are gone. I have to work 5 days a week, pay bills, and be concerned about things going on in the world. I have to be responsible. In actuality, responsibility is good. There is something else that is good though- something that a lot of my friends forgot about, something that keeps people from wanting to put a bullet in their head to escape their humdrum boring lives. That something is the ability to absolutely go fucking bonkers.
Let me specify what I mean by that. I do not mean running rampant on a bunch of nerds, or renting a van to mow down innocents. Going Bonkers in my eyes, is pure bliss. It is waking up in the morning and having a beer for breakfast. Its smoking so much pot that you almost believe in God. To me, it is motherfucking HARDfest.
HARD is the one time a year I can go completely crazy. It brings me back to my younger days. I forget about how old I might be getting, and the job that really kind of sucks. HARD is a weekend of beers, and pot, and some of the best music in the EDM scene. And really it means a Hell of a lot. Every year for the last 5 years, the one and only Bryan Kern(Cry Guy) and myself load up and head out. As soon as the car is loaded and moving down the road, nothing else matters. I switch in to what Cry Guy calls “Rage Mode” and I know for the next 48 hours- I am young again.
When people hear that I go to HARD, they ask me what it is. “Is it a Rave?” Honestly. I don’t fucking know what HARD is. Honestly, it doesn’t even matter. HARD is fun, its innocence, its Hedonism. HARD is a total fucking mess.
As I enter the people are always the first thing I notice, the girls in their bikini tops and far too short of shorts, the guys “peacocking” trying to look their best (the Turinabol helps). Then there is Cry Guy and I. Hawaiian Shirts and Safari hats setting out on the adventure of the weekend. We think we look cool as Hell, we probably look like 2 fucking Jabronis. We casually stroll the event for the first hour or so trying to figure out what exactly in the fuck is going on. Eventually we find our groove and settle in to the party. This last year it involved me getting so epically stoned, I think I described it as me flying on an Eagle through the highest levels of Heaven. (Thanks to that broad asking me if I was okay and totally killing my buzz. Special thanks to Say My Name for bringing it back.)
As I get older, every new HARD brings a slew of new questions. One of them is the same year after year. That question: Who are these performers? I miss the DJ’s of my younger days, but am always impressed by what I end up seeing. There is plenty of new (in my eyes) talent year after year, but also some classic throwbacks. This past year it was Felix Da Housecat, the year before, my all-time favorite, Colette B2B DJ Heather. Don’t let me down on some classic stuff this coming August HARD.
In short, I really just want to say Thank You HARDfest. The complete beautiful mess you are, is a wonderful experience. The 2 days of nonsense you provide is like a beacon in the night, to the strange, weird, and unstable people looking for a release of the everyday bullshit.
See You Next Year. — JJ Custer